Thursday, June 09, 2011

Introverts

“In the secret place of His tent He will hide me…” -Ps. 27:5

We introverts have to contend with a bad rap. How often have you heard a neighbor or fellow worker interviewed after some mad man has run amok and you hear, “He was always quiet and kept to himself.” A certain sinister reputation attends those who can be characterized thusly. There is a good deal of misunderstanding regarding introverted personalities, and it affects quite a few of us. Modern studies show that up to 50% of our American population may be considered “introverts.” I confess I am exhibit “A.” As far as I can remember, I was quite content to play by myself be it a sandbox or with blocks as a child or picking up my .22 cal. squirrel rifle and heading into the fields with my dog as a teen. It was not until much later that I began to wonder if something was wrong with me.

Adam McHugh has written a book entitled, Introverts in the Church: Finding Our Place in an Extroverted Culture. A major premise is the acknowledgement of a present day environment that prizes extroverted personalities that corresponds to the rise of our modern media. The heroes of our culture are the gregarious, hard-charging social leaders who can light up a room or electrify an audience be it on TV or in the church. Introverts readily acknowledge that they are not so gifted or even interested in attempting such a role. As a result, feelings of inferiority often develop as they see themselves not measuring up to our cultural models held in such high esteem. Introverts are often criticized for appearing stand-offish or even arrogant. This further tends to isolate them and deepen their insecurity.

In actuality, McHugh argues that introverts are neither anti-social or shy. He associates shyness with an unhealthy fear of social situations. Introverts are not shy but simply do not feel a pressing need for the company of a group. He cites brain research as showing that introverts have a physically demonstrable more active brain revealed by larger blood flow to differing parts of the brain. When an introverted child was queried by a parent why she didn’t play more with others, her innocent response was that she had plenty of activity going on in her own head. It appears that introverts have a great need to spend more time processing what is going on inside and do not need the external stimulation coming from voices around them as much as their extroverted cousins. When put into situations that demand a high level of social interaction in a compressed period of time, they can demonstrate actual physical symptoms of acute exhaustion because of the overload of such mental activity. Introverts prefer the company of one or two friends to the company of a group. They tend to think deeply and be very loyal to the friendships they do make.

As a parent, one always tends to worry about the child who is quite content to entertain themselves. They are quite easy to raise, but secretly we wonder if they are alright and if they will be as successful as their extroverted brothers or sisters. After all, we want our children all to be leaders, quarterbacks, captains, and class presidents. Adam McHugh challenges us, and rightly so, to look for the gifts that introverts bring to the table whether in the church or in life. In my mind, King David appears to me to have been a raging introvert. Content to spend his youth in the pasture tending sheep, he burst upon the Hebrew stage as a result of an intensely strong inner spiritual life cultivated in private. He took the reins of government reluctantly rather than through personal ambition. Throughout his life, the Psalms reveal a deep thoughtfulness and delight in a personal relationship with God alone and not in crowds of adoring subjects. History is replete with examples of introverts making tremendous contributions to progress in all the arts and sciences. Introverts make great mates, fathers, and mothers. Do you have one in your family? Worry not. Learn to prize them, encourage them, and cherish their unique giftedness. They may one day be the rock you need to lean upon.

Mercy and Truth, Mr. Moe

1 comment:

The King's Queen said...

Wonderful! I'm so glad I found your blog, Mr. Moe!

I am an introvert as well and often feel the pressure to conform, especially in the leadership roles that I facilitate. It sounds like I should check out this book!

Thanks for the thoughtful posts! I'm looking forward to diving in!