Internet

“For of this sort are they which creep into houses, and lead captive…” 2 Timothy 3:1-7

Up until now, I was under the impression that pornography was the gravest threat that was posed by the internet. No longer. For any parent who watched “Growing up online” on PBS in late January, I now share your terror of raising children in this brave new world. This was not a battle I had to fight in raising my children. But then, we had to fight things my parents never had to face. Each generation faces new challenges unique to its age. Unfortunately, the computer revolution has happened so quickly that many parents today are only vaguely familiar with what is happening on-line and are easy victims of a techno-generation gap. Some cannot even email while their children can surf the complexities of the internet with ease. For those of you who are not aware of the dangers on-line and who did not see this PBS horror show, I offer you a glossary of terms and worries that you can add to your anxiety closet. Sorry.

Internet addiction – the internet can be highly addictive to teens. When this occurs, they will spend every spare moment of time on the net surfing and conversing with thousands of other friends and perfect strangers. Removing computer access is difficult because of access through cell phones, friends, and public libraries. Symptoms include withdrawal, sleep deprivation, 3 syllable sentences, and secrecy.

Alter identities – teens can create alternative identities for themselves on-line. New names, new personas are adopted to fulfill fantasies and compensate for perceived weaknesses. Costuming and photography can portray images totally foreign to friends and family. Beware strange clothing (feather boas, leather collars, etc.) and the family digital camera showing up at the same place and same time.

Cyber bullying – internet communication can be an incredibly easy avenue to receiving threats and demeaning trash talk both from known and unknown sources. Boy-girl relationships offer great potential for humiliation and total destruction when treated with malevolence and maliciousness on-line. Anonymous messaging can be totally brutal and untraceable. Symptoms include ‘spontaneous’ fights at school, loss of self-esteem, ruined reputation, depression, and suicide.

Cyber assassination – a terrific and easy way to attack or destroy others. Similar to cyber bullying but done with greater creativity and designed for a wider audience. Most commonly done by posting photos and text in target-person’s name. Most effective ones are usually quite viciously humorous. Results can be total defamation and humiliation with occasional lawsuits or prosecution.

Virtual friends – through sites like Facebook.com and Myspace.com, teens can collect “friends” who may be known or unknown. Some try to make a contest out of it to see who can collect the most friends which, at times, can number in the thousands. This is often a fantasy world where teens have little or no assurance as to the validity of a “friend’s” age or id, their character, or their trustworthiness. This world of friends can be sealed against parental knowledge through a password known only to your teen. Symptoms include following bad counsel, intensified peer pressure, loss of desire to make real flesh-and-blood friends, rebellion, and knowledge of new and creepy websites.

Parental denial – a willful and intransigent belief that all is well in cyberspace. Even when receiving warnings about their teen, some parents continue to allow full, unsupervised internet access without questioning. This is usually accompanied by an unwavering faith in the internet as a good thing which promotes learning and technological prowess that could lead to a good job someday. Usually results in surprise and shock at later manifestations of deviant behavior.

Britannica.com – an innocuous website which techno-savvy teens can pull up and display when they see that a parent is monitoring their computer from another source. They can then continue to surf or chat while the proud and self-satisfied parent thinks junior is researching penguins for school.

Sparknotes.com – website which allows students to “read” most any work of classic literature in 5-10 minutes. Invaluable source for time-pressed teens in satisfying homework assignments or passing tests.

Secret lives – teens can live and explore a secret life on-line. Bulimics and anorexics can network with others of their ilk and surf websites dedicated to their compulsions. They can rapidly become an experienced pro with group support all without parents having a clue. Similar networks exist for those preoccupied with death and suicide, the occult, or simple terrorism. Symptoms for parents vary from blissful ignorance to head-line grabbing scandals.

Termpapersites.com – quick resource for plagiarizing material to satisfy all sorts of homework assignments. Symptoms include high proficiency with ‘copy’ and ‘paste’ options on their computers and generally good grades with some occasional, glaring exceptions.

Cyber predator – largely a bogey-man invented by adults to scare kids. Teens seem quite able to identify and delete those making inappropriate approaches. Any who actually agree to meet someone are considered ‘stupid’ or ‘extremely needy’ by their peers. Still, the existence of predators is real, and they regularly troll the net looking for the weak and unsuspecting. Most troubling aspect is that teens seem to value their anonymity above all. This is a world where intimacy is combined with anonymity.

On-line voyeurism - an added blessing of digital photography. Teens can trade revealing photos of themselves in a largely anonymous fashion. Photos are password protected but can turn up in various places and times in embarrassing fashion. YouTube.com allows for transmission of videos of all sorts. Cell phone footage of school fights is especially popular. Symptoms and results too diverse to mention. Biggest danger is that once a photo is “out there,” it becomes property of the whole world.

Opportunity Loss – the hidden cost of spending countless hours in on-line games, texting, and recreational gabbing. Symptoms include dullness of mind, fear of eye-to-eye contact with real people, and the possible realization that one’s teen years have been spent in shallow flirtation with empty amusements at a high cost of skills not acquired, books not read, and real friendships not made.

The teen culture has always been a very real and powerful voice in the lives of our young. Through the internet, however, that voice can be powerfully amplified and transmitted in unlimited quantity directly into homes around the world, all without parental knowledge of any kind. The danger is real, but except for the means of delivery, should not come as a surprise. Paul warned that “…in the last days perilous times shall come. For men shall be lovers of their own selves, covetous, boasters, proud, blasphemers, disobedient to parents, unthankful, unholy, without natural affection, trucebreakers, false accusers, incontinent, fierce, despisers of those that are good, traitors, heady, highminded, lovers of pleasures more than lovers of God; having a form of godliness, but denying the power thereof: from such turn away. For of this sort are they which creep into houses, and lead captive silly women laden with sins, led away with divers lusts, Ever learning, and never able to come to the knowledge of the truth.” ( 2 Tim. 3:1-7) We just marvel at the manner in which these voices are now able to creep into houses and lead the shallow and the silly away. On-line access should be treated like a license to drive a 2000 lb. automobile down a public street. The potential for damage is incredible. Instructions should abound, safeguards built in, and responsibility rewarded accordingly. May God equip you to do so with all discernment and wisdom.