Christmas

And she brought forth her firstborn son, and wrapped him in swaddling clothes, and laid him in a manger; because there was no room for them in the inn. Luke 2:7 KJV

Weddings and Christmas have a lot in common. There is all this anticipation and excitement over a 2-3 hour event that takes weeks and weeks of preparation. All the while, there is a picture perfect image that drives us with an idealized vision of how it should happen. Both are multi-faceted events where one has to worry and plan for guests, location, decoration, gifts, ritual, and, of course, food. Ordinary hot dogs and beans will not do. There has to be coordinated menu with some unique features that give the aura of individual creativity. Where most men would be happy with a pork chop and gravy, women fuss over what kind of sprinkly spices to drop in the egg nog or the punch. Ordinary china will not suffice either. We have a complete different set just for Christmas. Better Homes and Gardens would be pleased.

In all the planning, we also create in our minds the ideal words, looks, and excited thanksgiving that we would like to see come forth from all our loving family. We dream of that land where never is heard a discouraging word, and the skies are not cloudy all day; or so we would wish for at least one evening. The children will all be grateful and, oh, so helpful. Husbands will be sensitive, thoughtful, and read the minds of their wives. The in-laws will not be rude and will walk into your house with pure and overflowing admiration for all you have done. Even the dog will cooperate and not spill his water dish or worse (much worse).

The tension builds because we do not live in a perfect world. Dogs eat ornaments, children pout or get pukingly sick, husbands totally misread telepathic communication, in-laws say the darndest things, and mom discovers she is not Wonder Woman. Weddings are likewise remembered for the things that go wrong instead of all the things that go right. Candles go out, cakes tip over, attendants faint, and wardrobes fail all to the chagrin of mothers from the beginning of time.

Living with imperfection is a daily challenge for any family. We would like to have everything in its proper place and our children all tidy models of circumspection and genteel deportment. Alas, it doesn’t always happen. Over all, I am very impressed with your children arriving every day, freshly scrubbed, bright eyed, and for the most part, on time. I brag on you regularly. On the other hand, I know you are quite human simply by the things that fall out of your cars along with your children. There are shoes and rubber snakes, McDonald’s cups and crayons, beanie babies and old socks, and even groceries. I mistakenly opened the wrong door a few weeks ago and out poured the contents of two or three grocery bags. You would have enjoyed the sight of your administrator chasing cans of beans rolling down the driveway. I never know what I will encounter as you drive up. There are friendly dogs, occasionally a yipping dog, and once I found a complete plastic leg in the back floorboard. Then there are the days of sick kids with feverish looks wrapped in blankets. Today, one drove up holding a cup having just lost her breakfast.

It may be a wonderful life, but it is not easy, clean, convenient, ordered, and certainly not perfect. It never was. When we compare our discomforts and disappointments with those of Mary and Joseph, our complaints must be seen as so trivial. I take great comfort in the Christmas story, a tale totally immersed in imperfections and riddled with pain and conflict as well as glory. God works in the detritus and anguish of everyday life His wonders to perform. Struggle defines the Christmas story. He not only can use it to amplify His message, He came to share this messy existence with us and to share our discomfort and pain. May we not let our less-than-perfect cloud or obscure the glory that is Christmas.